Authored by Jaipi Sixbear in Dating
Published on 12-18-2009
Divorced women might be hesitant about dating. Dating may have changed quite a bit since you were last single. Internet dating, speed dating and other dating venues may not have existed the last time you were in the dating game. Emotional readiness is sometimes an issue as well. Hurt feelings during your marriage might carry over into new relationships. Safety tips could prove helpful as well. Here are some points divorced women might want to keep in mind before getting back into the dating game.
Fools Rush In
Don’t be in a big hurry to begin dating after divorce. Divorced women should think about their emotional readiness before dating. Do you still have strong feelings toward your former spouse? Are you harboring resentments concerning your marriage? Are the children ready to share you with someone who is not their father? Divorced women should not consider dating unless their emotional house is in order.
The Reason
What is the reason you wish to start dating again? Knowing this will help divorced women start dating again with a focused purpose. Are you looking for platonic companionship or a full commitment? Think about what type of relationship fits into your life at the present time. If you’re ticking away to start a family your dating approach will be different than if you are done raising children. Knowing what you want from a relationship will help you achieve it.
Who’s the Boss?
Divorced women may be used to dating in an era where men made all the decisions. Most men today expect a little more assertiveness from a woman. If you have talent, don’t be afraid to show it. Talk about your interests and hopes for the future. It’s OK to be a little flirty too. Look into his eyes and give up that deer in the headlights look. He will respect you for standing up and standing out. If he doesn’t, he’s not worth your time.
Class Act
Even though it’s OK to flirt and meet men in bars, it’s also best to be a class act. Avoid flaunting yourself and be genuine. Be honest about the fact that you are a divorced woman but save the details to be dispersed at a slow rate. Talking incessantly about the bad points of your ex-husband may give him the idea you are difficult to please. This is true even when you are being completely honest. Get to know him before you start blurting out the sordid details of your past relationship.
This is How We do It
Sometimes this is a very tough thing for divorced women. The way we meet people has changed drastically in the past 20 years. Dating may be much more casual than it was before your marriage. For instance, meeting someone in a bar setting is no longer as taboo as it once was. Internet dating is very popular and not necessarily just for a good time. Remain open about the possibility of meeting people in a less conventional way.
Risky Business
Due to the fact that dating has likely changed, divorced women should always have safety as a priority. The first few dates should be group dates. Meet in public places, rather than having your date pick you up at home. If you have children, take your time about bringing them into your dating life. Divorced women and their children are often targets for sexual predators. Don’t be overly afraid but do take precautions to protect yourself and your family from harm.
Divorced women who are getting back into the dating game should take it slow and easy. Think about the reason you want to start dating again. Consider the type of relationship you are looking for. Be assertive and remain a class act. Be ready to do things a little differently than you did 20 years ago. Things have changed since then. Remain open to new ideas. Finally, divorced women who are starting to date again should always keep safety in mind.