How To Ask For That First Kiss

The first kiss . . .

This requires a look back over many years for me. Almost four decades, if you must know.

And for that matter, as is often the case for a girl, I didn’t have to do the asking.

It’s tougher for a guy I think.

He is usually the one who must put his ego on the line, and make the first move. And the first kiss?

High pressure, my friend.

Particularly at the age that the average teen is looking for this experience, this is a bit like walking through landmines.

How is a guy to know for sure if a girl is interested in him? Some girls will keep their opinion to themselves as to whether they like this guy or not. He won’t know until he’s had to lay it on the line waiting for her thumbs up or down. Let him live, or … die.

And, listen, just in case any young innocent males are reading this – asking is probably, well, the kiss of death.

“May I kiss you?” Or, “Would it be okay if I kiss you?”

Sorry, but the inevitable answer from the average nervous teenage girl is almost certainly “No!” Whether she’d really secretly like it or not.

So there he is, on the firing line, trying to make up his mind whether to go for it or not.

No envy here.

A young lady who seems interested is no sure thing for that first kiss either. Some girls, I’m embarrassed to say (being of that fair gender myself) are very pleased to set a guy up and let him fall, just for the fun of it. Others may not be so callous, but flirting is one thing, actually … kissing a guy may be another matter entirely. She may simply chicken out.

And there he stands with egg on his face.

Now, we could fast-forward a few years, away from this pitiful scenario.

Maybe the first kiss in question is not his first ever kiss. Maybe it’s the first one with this particular girl.

Let’s say they’ve been on friendly terms awhile. Maybe she’s been giving him signs of interest. Seeking him out at work perhaps, laughing at all his jokes whether they’re funny or not. And he likes her too. He’s lingered at her desk, maybe asked her to join him for coffee or a lunch break. Things maybe seem pretty promising.

How is a guy supposed to handle this situation?

It’s still a bad idea to ask, “May I kiss you?” or “Would it be okay if I kiss you?” The answer is still probably going to be “No”. So he is still probably going to have to stick his neck out, still going to have to try to assess how real her interest is. Still have to take the chance and just . . . go for it.

Huh. It would be alot simpler if she took the initiative, leaned in and planted one on him. Isn’t that every guy’s dream girl?


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