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How to Become the Alpha Male in the Relationship

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Authored by Johnny Dunn in Dating
Published on 03-01-2009

She controls what movies to watch. She controls what food you’ll be eating. She controls everything in this relationship, doesn’t she? Maybe you need a weapon. Maybe you need to learn some tips to fight back and gain control in the relationship.

Though you don’t want to seem too aggressive, it’s not any fun if the woman in your relationship is a total control freak, but that’s just how they are. Sexism aside, it’s biology that says women are usually more demanding, especially in things like relationships. Here are some tips that will help us men fight back:

1. Make your needs and desires clear

There can’t be a compromise in a relationship if she doesn’t know what you want. The first step is to stop agreeing with her on everything because you’re scared of losing her, you won’t. Make your needs and your desires absolutely clear.

2. Stand your ground

Don’t waver if she disagrees. Don’t quiver if she yells. And don’t lose if she fights. Be firm and let her know that you’re steady in your views. Don’t appear to be weak or lose your nerve. This’ll just cast the illusion of you being a pushover, and if you are a pushover, you don’t want people to know. They, especially significant others, can easily take advantage of you and get things they want. Never be vague in what you want, someone can easily misinterpret it.

3. Don’t be the perfect chivalrous man she wants you to be

Do not do everything she says just to please her if it doesn’t please you. Don’t be the perfect chivalrous man she wants you to be, otherwise you’ll be catering to her every demand. She will become the dominant one in the relationship, not you. If you want to go and play poker with your buddies, don’t go out of your way to tell her that you’re going and ask if it’s all right. There’s no reason to, you’re not doing anything wrong but enjoying yourself. Chivalry’s dead anyway, the romance you see in movies almost never exist.

4. Don’t go too far

Remember, this article is all in good fun. It is never healthy for only one person to totally dominate a relationship, that’s why a relationship is between two people, not just one. Arguing will never get anything done but compromise will. Always try and see your partner’s point-of-view and listen to them. Trust is one of the healthiest factors in a relationship and is the basis of the best marriages. If you truly have problems with domination in a relationship, sometimes it might not be the best to take things into your own hands. If problems are really bad, then don’t try to fix them yourself, talk with your partner and don’t try and take control if it really has a chance of ruining a relationship. Marriage counseling is never a thing to be ashamed of and it’s always better than ruining a marriage yourself.

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