Jealousy is a green-eyed monster that, when left uncontrolled, can be detrimental to your life. This monster can rear its ugly head in relationships, in the workplace, and in everyday situations when you see someone whose tummy is a bit flatter than yours. Learning to control your jealousy is key to maintaining a healthy and productive lifestyle, so try these tips to reign in the green-eyed monster in your life.
Know who you are: If admitting that there is a problem is the first step to recovery, then knowing who you are is the first step to controlling your jealousy. Acknowledge your imperfections and celebrate your positive attributes. If you aren’t as thin or as rich as the next person, so what? Maybe you have a sharp wit, and family and friends who adore you. Loving yourself for who you are will make you more confident, and less likely to be envious of others.
Reevaluate: Is jealousy affecting your everyday life? If you answered yes, then maybe it is time to reevaluate your life. Jealousy can be a sign that something is missing in your life, so it is critical to find the underlying cause. For example, if you are terribly envious of a co-worker who occupies the corner office with the view, maybe you should become more dedicated in your work. Take the energy that you are using to covet your co-worker’s success, and channel it into ascending your own corporate ladder. Who knows, maybe someday you could have a corner office of your own.
Trust: Having a mild level of jealousy in a relationship is healthy, in that you are demonstrating to your partner a certain level of passion and interest. However, when jealousy is uncontrolled and consumes a relationship it is a red flag for trust issues. Harnessing jealousy and having faith in your partner will create a more loving and positive environment. For some, letting go of jealousy and letting in trust are the hardest things to do in a relationship, so it is important to remember that the rewards definitely outweigh the risks.
Trust can also involve having faith in yourself. Constantly focusing on your insecurities and shortcomings will only increase your jealous streak. However, if you trust in your talents and abilities you will stop comparing yourself to others and learn to control your jealousy.
Desperate measures: Knowing who you are, reevaluating your life, and learning to trust are all great solutions for learning to control your jealousy, but they all take time to develop. If you need a fast fix for your jealous feelings try thinking about the negative attributes of the person or thing that spawns your jealousy. Realizing that the person or thing you envy also has flaws will help you control your jealousy. You can also set aside a certain time to think about all of your jealous feelings, no matter what they are. This will only work if you refuse to let yourself focus on your jealousy during any other time.
Having jealous emotions is completely normal, however it is important to know how to control your envious streak. By following these tips you will be better equipped to fight off the green-eyed monster in your life.