Authored by Angela Coleman in Dating
Published on 09-08-2009
How do you date your best friend? You may have known that guy or gal for what seems ages, but then both of you sense that your relationship seems to be evolving into something deeper. Knowing how to make the transition from two pals hanging out to a couple going on dates can seem awkward at first. There are some things you can do to make things run more smoothly.
Move slowly. Knowing each other in a romantic way is different from knowing each other as friends. Never start dating with the assumption that you know everything there is to know about him or her. There can be a whole new side to that person when he or she is involved in a more intimate relationship with you. Give things time to develop.
Do things that make you more attractive to that person. When you were best friends, wearing baggy tee shirts, old jeans and a baseball cap might have sufficed. Once you begin dating, though, you should begin presenting yourself in a manner that makes you more physically appealing. For instance, he may like seeing a woman in a dress that shows off her curves or she might prefer a guy with a clean shaven look instead of peach fuzz on his face. If you don’t know their preferences, simply ask them what it is they like.
Avoid talking about past loves. When you were just buddies, talking about exes or crushes to him or her was not a problem. Now that you and your best friend are in a dating relationship, however, your references to former girlfriends or boyfriends could stir up jealousy and create tension between you. Make that person feel that he or she is the one you want to concentrate on. Tell them how special they are to you.
Nix being overly possessive. If you have a tendency to be too clingy to those you are dating, this is not a good habit to bring into your growing romance with your best friend. Give them room to breathe. Allow them to seek you out sometimes. Avoid constantly bombarding them with calls at all hours or quizzing them about their whereabouts or insisting that they spend all their free time with you. Being possessive could not only tank your dating relationship, but damage your friendship.
Decide whether or not you want to make an official announcement that you and your best friend are now dating. Letting your families and mutual friends aware that the status of your relationship has changed will get them used to seeing you as a couple. On the other hand, you may want to wait for awhile to see whether your dating relationship pans out before you start telling too many people.
Remember to still be yourself. Although dating your best friend requires some adjustments, you should continue to basically be yourself. It was, after all, the qualities you already possessed that caused your feelings towards each other to morph into romance.